


Paling, Fading

by nakymatonlapsi



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types
Genre: Break Up, Falling Out of Love, M/M, One-Sided Love, be warned this is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-13
Updated: 2014-04-13
Packaged: 2018-01-19 04:04:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1454710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nakymatonlapsi/pseuds/nakymatonlapsi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Combeferre loves Courfeyrac and Courfeyrac loves Combeferre. Until he doesn't anymore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Paling, Fading

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this post: http://seagreeneyes.tumblr.com/post/75617443896/orestesblasting-pyladesfunk-ok-anyone-breaking  
> I like making myself sad.

Courfeyrac and Combeferre are one of those disgustingly sweet couples. The kind that holds hand in the hallway and walks each other to class and has regular lunch dates. Courfeyrac takes Combeferre out for lunch every Tuesday. He holds his hand a lot.  
Courfeyrac remembers that holding Combeferre hand once felt like the most natural and at the same time most singularly extraordinary thing in the world. It felt like being part of something bigger than just two people being joined by their intertwined hands. He felt like they were joined by their hearts beating the same rythm as well.  
Now he notices how sweaty Combeferre fingers are and it feels a little like being hold back. 

*

Courfeyrac loves Combeferre and he has loved him ever since they first became friends years and years ago. He knows him better than anyone else and when their love shifted from platonic to romantic their relationship didn't change all that much. They came together smoothly, almost effortlessly. If anything is shifting now, Courfeyrac doesn't want to think about it. Point is, he loves Combeferre. Combeferre loves him back. They belong together.

*

Courfeyrac holds Combeferre as they sit on the couch watching TV, their bodies intertwined. When Combeferre kisses him, it feels like kissing his best friend. Courfeyrac kisses back nonetheless.

*

In a bar, Courfeyrac meets a boy. He is drawn to him the instant he lays eyes on him and from the looks he's receiving the feeling is mutual. Courfeyrac strides over, introduces himself. Combeferre isn't there. He buys the boy a drink and they get along great. Courfeyrac walks him home and when he bids him goodbye he can see his own hunger reflected in those green eyes. He doesn't kiss him and refuses his offer to come in for coffee and more. Combeferre is waiting for him in their bed at home. Combeferre loves him. Combeferre is his best friend. Courfeyrac hates himself for it all the way home.

*

Combeferre is asleep beside him and Courfeyrac looks at him for what feels like the first time in months. He looks, and tries to find the familiar twitch, the fluttery feeling in his stomach, anything that resembles longing, wanting. He finds nothing. There is only steady, friendly warmth. He gets up, makes coffee, cries a little.

*

Combeferre touches him and it feels all wrong. He tries very hard to want it. To want Combeferre the way he used to. Tries to love the way Combeferre loves him. He has to turn away from his boyfriend once again. Combeferre doesn't pressure him. Courfeyrac loves Combeferre. He loves him.

*

He meets another boy in one of his classes. He's careful not to look at him too much when they talk. When he tells Combeferre about him, he doesn't meet his eyes either.

*

It's their anniversary. He hasn't kissed Combeferre properly in four months.

*

The boy is still on Courfeyrac's mind a month later. He doesn't know Courfeyrac is in a relationship because Courfeyrac hasn't mentioned Combeferre. They go out for dinner and Courfeyrac puts on his best shirt. When the boy tries to kiss him, he doesn't turn his head away.

*

When Courfeyrac gets home, he tells Combeferre, because Combeferre is his best friend. Combeferre cries, and then Courfeyrac cries too. He reaches out to hold his friend and Combeferre flinches from his touch. He leaves to spend the night at Enjolras' place. Courfeyrac stays alone in their empty appartment and cries harder. 

*

The next day, Enjolras comes to pack Combeferre's stuff. He looks at Courfeyrac with a strange mixture of anger and pity that seems very out of place on his face. When he asks him if he's okay, Courfeyrac says he is and tries to smile. It comes out as a sob. Enjolras hugs him tightly. 

*

He moves in with Jehan for a while. The poet comforts him after the meetings, when Combeferre won't meet his eyes. He looks gaunt and older than he is. Courfeyrac's heart aches so much he can barely breathe. He misses Combeferre. Misses his habits, his hugs and the way they used to curl up around each other on the couch. He misses his best friend more than anything.

*

Courfeyrac continues to see the boy. They frequent bars and restaurants Courfeyrac is sure that Combeferre wouldn't go to. The boy's hands are never sweaty when he holds them.

*

Combeferre talks to him again during meetings. He looks at him with careful eyes. They don't see each other outside of their group of friends. Courfeyrac's heart doesn't quite stop yearning for the piece of him that shattered when he fell out of love with his best friend. His ex-best friend. 

*

He never gets to know about the ring in Combeferre's bedside drawer.


End file.
